Plan change. again.

One word to describe me: planner. Maybe some of you would say the same, but maybe some of you say you could care less about making a plan. Hmmm... even those who say they aren't a planner have plans. Plans to get married one day, to have a nice job, to live in a certain place, or maybe you are making plans for what you want to do this summer or just what to eat tonight! We have to plan. It's in our nature to plan. Some of us plan more than others.

Even God gave plans to those in the Bible. He even had the greatest plan ever that would solve the biggest problem known to mankind! You know, when we screwed up, our ancestors Adam and Eve wayyyyy back in the Garden of Eden. They sinned, ate the fruit that God told them not to eat. Sin means disobeying God. But God, because of his deep, unending love for them, and everyone else who came after them, including you and me, made a plan.

His plan was the greatest of plans. He planned to send his son Jesus, who is fully God, to live on this earth and receive every temptation and hardship that we also experience here. But he didn't sin. He never messed up because He was perfect. This was crucial because his purpose of coming was to die on the cross IN OUR PLACE to receive all the wrath that God had for us because of our mess ups and sins. His purpose for this plan is so that all of us, no matter who you are or what you have done, have a chance to receive eternal life and restore our broken relationship with a perfect God. This means that if you accept Jesus because of what He did for you on the cross, believing that you're so broken and need a Savior, then He will adopt you into his family, call you His child, and give you an eternal home with Him when your time on earth is over. And while you're on earth, He will be with you every step of the way. He is the only thing on earth that can satisfy you and make you whole. Because sin invaded this earth, our lives are broken and hard, but living with Jesus makes it so much easier to get through the hard times.

Our plans will fail. We aren't God, so we aren't all-powerful and all-knowing. We will never know the perfect plan for our lives. We will never understand why things happen the way they do. One day, our lives could seem to be going perfectly then all of a sudden, the unthinkable, unplanned event happens and we're back to our broken and sad lives that don't make sense to us.

But this is one reason why God's plan is so amazing. When our plans fail, we know that if we belong to Christ and accept Him to be the Lord of our lives, then He has the perfect plan for us. Romans 8:28 says that all things work for the good of those who love Him and are called according to his purpose. This includes the bad, unplanned events that occur in our lives. Proverbs 16:9 says that the heart of a man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps. 

I am working through an unplanned event in my life right now. I feel like God has just taken me back a few steps in my life. But even though it hurts, I can already see how God is using my unplanned event to remind me that I am so broken and STILL in desperate need of Him even though I accepted him as Lord when I was so little. He's reminding me that even when I think I'm awesome and have it all together, I actually can't make any good plan on my own. He is the one who gives the best and perfect plan for my life. He is the one who already gave me the best plan that has ever happened in all eternity. And I am so thankful that He did plan to die for me and that I now live with Him. I can trust that when my plans fail, his plans never will. And I know He only has good things to come for me.

Get at me if you want to know more about what this means for your own life!
Love,
A

Here I am. again.

Yes, I have neglected this blog. It's been on my heart today to write a post. God is really working in my heart right now, and I would love to share with you what is going on. Maybe this will encourage you because you're going through something similar. Or maybe this will just be interesting for you to know what is going on with me. Whatever it is, I hope that God uses this to speak to you just like he has spoken to me.

I titled this blog "Let's be real". Sorry, it wouldn't let me call the domain by the title, so I used my twitter/instagram username (allybent). Here's why I titled it that....

I lead/work in a ministry with high school students called Cru high school in the Raleigh/Durham area. I love it. Most of my girls have heard me say multiple times, "Let's be real", or something along those lines. Why? Because our culture and world today is SO GOOD at hiding, hiding from what's really going on in their lives. I hate that. I love and value genuineness and realness, and I know God does too. Check out 1 John 1:5-10 that talks about how we should walk in the light, our sins and selves exposed, because God is in the light, and then, we can have REAL fellowship with Him and other believers.

One blog that is written by a couple of my friends has really inspired me because I can see God working through these 2 girls, Heather and Kelly, and their blog because they are real with girls on the issues that we face. Please go read it. It's called A Girl Like Me.

Now, I don't think that we should use technology and social media to be real with others. Technology and the internet is just another way that we can hide. It's easy to tell a complete stranger, over the internet, without looking at them face to face what is going on in our lives. Key phrase there is "face to face". I hope and pray that through my posts, you will be encouraged to seek Jesus first in every part of your life, and also to talk with others, people you know and who care about you, about something brought up here that hit something in your heart.

That is the purpose of my blog posts: That they will lead you to see and seek Jesus in every part of your life, and that they will encourage you to share with others (face to face, or at least verbally) what is going on in your life and heart.

I'll be back soon to share about something that has just happened in my life (and it sucks), but I know that God is using it for my good and His glory. Hopefully it will also encourage and challenge you.

Love, A

Recycled Blog

This is a recycled blog. As you can see from the older posts, I've had it for awhile. I am realizing facebook is out, blogging is in, especially the "out of college" young adults group. I may try to be different, but this is one of those things that I am jumping on the bandwagon.

Watch out, bloggers. I have arrived. again

I am so thankful that I'm not religious

Today I encountered God in a coffee shop.

Maybe it was watching all the silly flies trying to escape from the shop as they continually flew into the window thinking that they were going to escape to the beautiful, sunny outdoors. God created those brainless bugs for a reason. The flies reminded me that we, humans, are just like those flies when it comes to the decisions we make. We are so stupid and we need our Creator, Sustainer of the Universe, and Heavenly Father, to point us to the "way out" of whatever sin we are stuck in, decision we have to make, or trial that we are going through.
Sorry, flies, for not having the ability to show you the way out. I would look very ridiculous trying to wave bugs out in this coffee shop.

On a more serious note of experiencing God in a coffee shop, I was reminded today of how God delights in me and wants me to delight in Him. I'm so thankful that I am not religious. I am so glad that what I believe in doesn't demand of me to bow down 5 times a day in prayer or attend an awfully boring service. God loves that I am in a coffee shop right now enjoying time in His word and thinking about how He delights in me enjoying His creation.

The Lord your God is with you. He is mighty to save. He will sing over you with gladness. He will quiet you with His love. He will delight in you with shouts of joy. Zephaniah 3:17

Thank you, God, for creating coffee for me to enjoy. Thank you for music and that I have a laptop to enjoy. Thank you for the pestering bugs that just want to delight in the outdoors. Thank you for creating me :)

Chill Time

If you know me, you know that I am always "on the go". I always have to find something "to do" and can't just sit around watching TV or "wasting time". Well, since I had my surgery on May 11, I have done hardly anything at all since May 11. It's been almost 2 weeks since my surgery. I have been "out" one night to Evan's house, but other than that and the doctor, I have been couped up inside my room.

It really stinks because I feel like I'm wasting time if I just sit in my room all day. But, it's good to relax and have time alone. This is what I have wanted all school year! I am trying to enjoy it. I ordered a ukulele today so hopefully I'll pick that up. :-) I also have canvases to paint. And plenty of thinking to do too. And Jesus. I don't know what I'd be thinking without Him.

God is definitely trying to show me something through all this. I just need to take a chill pill and realize he's God and he's in control. I'm not in control and need to find peace and comfort in that.

A Change of Plans

Just an update of my life:

Many already know, but exactly a week ago, I broke my ankle. My friends and I went to the beach one night to watch the sunrise (which was beautiful) but not worth the consequences. I saw a shark and decided to jump in the water to wrestle it... well it wasn't the smartest decision I've ever made.

End results: a broken ankle

That meant that my double jaw surgery I have been planning to have for 2 years had to be rescheduled because I was supposed to have it last Tuesday which was 2 days after the broken ankle had happened. The doctor was afraid that a blood clot would form and kill me. Didn't want to take that risk for obvious reasons. Well this is the second time we rescheduled this surgery because I was going to have it last December but the doctor said I wasn't ready.

For the third time, the surgery is scheduled for May right after my last final. I was planning on going to Venezuela this summer on summer project with Student Venture but now I can't go because my jaw surgery will take a good 2 months to completely heal.

As you can imagine my disappointment in all of this from one stupid decision to go to the beach one night impulsively.

What have I learned in all of this:

Jesus loves me more than anyone in this world and I have trusted my life with Him. So if this is His plan for me, then I will rejoice all the more in my sufferings.

He will make me more beautiful through all of his because I will become even more like Him!
 
Consider it pure joy my brothers whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. James 1:2-4

God's plans are not my plans. His are greater.

"For My thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways My ways," says the LORD. "For as the heavens are higher than the earth, So are My ways higher than your ways, And My thoughts than your thoughts. Isaiah 55:8-9

Beauty

 I wrote this last may. I was re reading it. I really just love to think about this...


What is beauty? How do we know what is beautiful in the world? Colors are beautiful. Sunsets are beautiful. People are beautiful. Loving people is beautiful. Love is beautiful. God is love, and God is beauty. It comes back to the whole absolute truth discussion. How can one know what truth is without there being a god? God is absolute truth and the only way we can know this absolute truth is from God and his Word. So, just as we only know absolute truth from our omniscient God, the only way we can know beauty is because of our glorious God who created all things to be beautiful. John Piper said it like this that made a lot more sense to me:
“Suppose that you were standing by the Grand Canyon at sunset with two other people. You become deeply moved and utter the words, "This is beautiful; this is glorious." The person beside you says, "Beautiful? It's just a big, ugly ditch." And the third person says, "I guess I hear what both of you are saying. And I think those are equally valid statements." And it is true that unless there is a higher aesthetic court of appeal than man, those two judgments are equally valid.”

I was reading in Exodus when God came to Moses to give him the old covenant. Moses came back down the mountain to the Israelites and his face was glowing from being in the presence of God. Not even the Israelites could look steady at Moses’ face because he saw a glimpse of the glory and beauty of God. (2 Corinthians 3:7). Well, I read a sermon by John Piper called “Jesus Is Precious Because We Yearn For Beauty”. (For some reason tonight I am fascinated by just the meaning of “beauty”.) John Piper got me thinking about the glory and beauty that Moses and the Israelites had witnessed because of God giving them the Old Covenant. The Old Covenant was glorious to the Israelites for it was their way to experience and know God through sacrifices and the laws God had given them. But now, God has given us the greatest gift of all: the new covenant! We, as Christians, should be able to experience and know beauty more than ever before! 2 Corinthians 3:8-9 says “will not the ministry of the Spirit be even more glorious? If the ministry that condemns men is glorious (beautiful), how much more glorious (beautiful) is the ministry that brings righteousness!” This new covenant is of God sending his one and only son, Jesus, to die the death that takes away the sins of the world! This covers all the sins I have ever committed and will commit and the sins of you and everyone else that has ever lived and is still to come. God has given us his Spirit so that we may see the beauty of the Lord and have everlasting freedom. God is holding this everlasting and most beautiful gift ever out in front of us. All we have to do is accept it from Him (Ephesians 2:8-9).

God is beauty. Since I am a follower and have accepted his Spirit to live inside of me, I have the amazing and undeserved privilege to experience perfect beauty. I know that I am beautiful because Christ lives inside of me, and I just want to live for Him. Just tonight I made a list of what is beautiful in my life. The list just kept flowing. “Therefore there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” Romans 8:1.
John Piper says this, “If there is no personal God, then the concept of beauty dissolves into personal idiosyncrasy.” And I believe this whole-heartedly.

“And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.” 2 Corinthians 3:18

“He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from the beginning to the end.” Ecclesiastes 3:11

God sending Jesus down to earth to die for me has now given me a hope and joy that keeps me living for Him every day. People wonder why I am always smiling, laughing, or enjoying the stupid little things that might mean nothing to anyone else but me. The reason for this is because I find beauty in my Savior, Jesus Christ, and can’t help but be excited about it. :-)